How much love is bubbling, sweet pea? - Your Grandmother

ABOUT ME:

Developing videogame...and playing them is my passion. I would totally have more time to work on things like this if It wasn't for my stupid roomate sometimes building a 'frecken laser cannon at 2AM. Look, I love Isaac Clarke and his games (Dead Space), but he's got to learn to cool it. I DON'T CARE IF THIS TURNS NECROMORPHS INTO SMITHEREENS, YOU LITTERALLY ALMOST SLICED MY GRANDMAS FACE OFF WHILE WE WERE HAVING FAMILY DINNER!

WHAT DO I DO?

I am a world-renown youtuber, dabbling in making AMAAAZING videos and posting them online. I don't curse because I'm afraid Father Comstock (Bioshock Infinite) is gonna sell me to do forced labor in Columbia. Occasionally, I'll volunteer in my community by promoting a roadway-safety program. I do this by driving my semi-truck on the opposite lane of traffic down the freeway to really promote the awarness of drivers. I'm basically a humanitarian since I'm all over my town's facebook page and the local sheriff's department is always on the lookout to collab with me.

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MY FAVORITE THINGS:

Stealing dress-up inflatables from birthday parties... Just kidding!! Whaaaat, Never! It's actually going on a crime spree in GTA5's Los Santos while playing as Franklin. I mean, he's just got an amazing personality, especially when it's both him and the 'G' Lamar Davis! First/Third person Horror & Action-Adventure games are by far my favorite. That includes: Resident Evil, Tomb Raider, Bioshock, Silent Hill, & Fallout 4.

FUTURE GOALS:

Isaac needs to start paying rent. Literally, last week he tried to pay me with scrap metal...SCRAP METAL!! WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH SCRAP METAL!! I felt bad for the boyo that I accepted it anyway. I really think he's starting to partake in the 'wacky tabacky'; as the youngsters are reffering to nowadays. Really, he's becoming a bad influence. I WALKED IN MY ROOM THE OTHER DAY AND SAW MY DOG HIGH OUT OF HIS MIND WITH A BLUNT IN HIS MOUTH!! I CHASED HIM AROUND THE HOUSE WHEN HE GOT HIS PAWS ON THE LASER CANNON AND BLASTED MY 'FRECKIN ARM OFF! BLOOD WAS GUSHING EVERYTWHERE AND I SCREAMED OUT THE MOST FOUL CURSE WORD I COULD THINK OF!! Wait a minute.... where am I anyway? COLUMBIA!? FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

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